Valentine's Day Collection
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The Young Frosty | Ugly Christmas Sweater PantsVendor: ShinestySnowflakes may be cold, but these pants are hotter than hot. Match them with the coordinating blazer to melt the hearts of any snowflakes that get close enough for you to catch on your tongue.
- $64.99 USD
- $64.99 USD
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The Spread Eagle | Retro Ski BeanieVendor: ShinestyI asked our graphic designer the first thing he thought of when he saw this spread eagle ski beanie. The Answer? Sex. I continued, asking "Was it really?" He doubled down, ensuring me spread eagle does, in fact, mean sex. So there you have...
- $29.99 USD
- $29.99 USD
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The Rockefeller | Tartan Plaid TuxedoVendor: ShinestyWho wants to look like a million bucks when they can look like an (inflation adjusted) 340 billion bucks? Don't bother answering that because it's not you. Instead, meet The Rockefeller Tartan Print Blazer - for those who enjoy the finest things in life....
- $249.99 USD
- $249.99 USD
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The Red Dress Effect | Red Ball Hammock® Pouch UnderwearVendor: ShinestyYou may have heard of something known as the red dress effect, but we'd like to introduce a new, simpler theory. It's called the red dong effect, the idea that sliding into a pair of these solid red boxer briefs causes ladies across the...
- $29.99 USD
- $29.99 USD
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The Poinsettia Playgirl | Red Plaid Christmas JumpsuitVendor: ShinestyWhat is there to say about this hot little red plaid jumpsuit... Taking your top off to pee is a small price to pay when it comes to enjoying holiday beverages with extreme holiday style, but all the compliments you'll get on the retro...
- $59.99 USD
- $59.99 USD
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The Peacock Player | Peacock Print PantsVendor: ShinestyIntroducing the Peacock player, the single greatest green peacock feather pants ever invented if anyone else even invented them. In many cultures the peacock is a sexual deity, possessing the ability to cause ground-shaking orgasms from merely the sight of his plumage. That may...
- $64.99 USD
- $64.99 USD
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The Mascot | American Flag Ball Hammock® Pouch UnderwearVendor: ShinestyIntroducing The Mascot Ball Hammock®, aka the eagle's nest, where your balls will experience an unprecedented level of comfort and support from here on out. It's as if your plums mounted a cloud while riding Falcor from The Neverending Story. Or, in this case,...
- $29.99 USD
- $29.99 USD
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The Cruise Ship Casanova | Orange Hawaiian SuitVendor: ShinestyIf you're not planning on being the drunkest kid in the sandbox in this tropical island suit blazer, this may not be your cup of tea. If you're not planning on slaying the worm in an overly retro cruise ship club, then this beacon...
- $129.99 USD
- $129.99 USD
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The Daytona Dong Sarong | Denim Print Swim BriefVendor: ShinestyThey say jorts are the above-ground pool of the shorts world. We'd be inclined to agree. Our denim print swim brief, also known as the Daytona Dong Sarong, is just like that, except it is the above-ground hot tub of the swim brief world...or...
- $44.99 USD
- $44.99 USD
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The Butlers | Tuxedo Swim BriefVendor: ShinestyIf you're a pool boy, you have found the holy grail with our tuxedo swim brief. Now Mrs. Peterson has no choice but to give you the mid-thigh elevator eyes while you scrub out the pool that hasn't been used since 'Nam. But it...
- $24.99 USD
- $24.99 USD
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The Big Bang | Glow In The Dark Constellation Long Leg Ball Hammock® Pouch Underwear With FlyVendor: ShinestyI bet you first saw this pattern and said, "aww! I love the stars!" Then, I bet you were like, "let me find the big dipper, I can always find that" and upon exploration of these constellation pattern long leg Ball Hammock® underwear you...
- $29.99 USD
- $29.99 USD
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The Red & Black Lumberjack | Buffalo Check SuitVendor: ShinestyHere is what you need to know about the Red & Black Lumberjack Buffalo Check Party Blazer (or suit or pants or whatever look you are into): *This red plaid Christmas suit is not for hipsters, whatsoever. Sure, you may be saying, "But, I'm...
- $129.99 USD
- $129.99 USD
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The Cruise Ship Casanova | Orange Hawaiian Suit PantsVendor: ShinestyIf you're not planning on being the drunkest kid in the sandbox in these tropical island suit pants, this may not be your cup of tea. If you're not planning on slaying the worm in an overly retro cruise ship club, then this beacon...
- $64.99 USD
- $64.99 USD
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White Lightning | Mens White SuitVendor: ShinestyFrom God to Don Johnson, the coolest bros know how to rock a solid white suit. Get yours and enjoy the thrill of being mistaken for someone's conscience or guardian spirit, or wear it on a Color Run for the kind of shock value...
- $129.99 USD
- $129.99 USD
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The Van Buren | Stars And Stripes Ties By OpposuitsVendor: Shinesty
- $9.99 USD
- $9.99 USD
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The Tommy J | American Flag Suit JacketVendor: ShinestyWhy'd we name this red and white striped American flag blazer after Tommy J? Well, one night a few years back we were sitting at Topper's bar and grill in Greencastle, Indiana, when ole Tommy Jeff himself (or the ghost of...who can really say,...
- $129.99 USD
- $129.99 USD
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The Screamin Eagles | American Flag OverallsVendor: ShinestyThese American flag overalls are not for the faint of heart. Either you love them, or you despise them, and therefore despise America. Our USA overalls make the Ringling Brothers harder than Plymouth Rock and are fit for two scenarios and two scenarios only...
- $49.99 USD
- $49.99 USD
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The Red Rockets | Men's Red Suit PantsVendor: ShinestyYou probably don't think you need red suit pants, but I used to dislike hummus. How do red pants and hummus relate? Well, they don't really, but the moral of the story is that you can be wrong sometimes. I was about hummus. Pro...
- $64.99 USD
- $64.99 USD
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The Rock Star Of David | Hanukkah Sweater SuitVendor: ShinestyFor just 8 easy installments of $12.50 this Ugly Hanukkah (aka Hanukah, aka Chanukah) Sweater Suit, which your Jewish bubby will surely love, can rest beautifully in your closet 357 or 356 days out of the year. You're probably asking, "What do I do...
- $99.99 USD
- $99.99 USD
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